While in the planning stages of my year off, I had mentioned to a person I met that I would be traveling to India in January to which they told me that someone named Mooji would be hosting a satsang around the same time and I absolutely MUST go. I had no idea who Mooji was or even what a satsang entailed and a quick google search didn’t help me out any. The only Mooji I could find was some guy from Jamacia and I had the assumption I was looking for an Indian. I didn’t bother looking up what a satsang was, I got the just of what might go on from the name, and though I didn’t understand why it was a big deal, I made a plan to attend one as I did actually somewhat enjoy sitting and singing.

As it would turn out, what I had envisioned a satsang to be and what it actually turned out to be were two very different things. My visions of sitting in a circle singing mantras with some Indian swami were pretty far off from the satsangs I attended (though there was usually some singing involved, so the name was not a complete mis-advertisement). Many satsangs were being held in Rishikesh at the time I was there, and my biggest surprise was that none of that were hosted by actual Indians! The “gurus” that everyone came to partake in a satsang with were from all over the world including Europe, America and South America (turns out I had the correct Jamacian Mooji to begin with) and people traveled from all over the world to see them in India. I have to admit, I was slightly cynical of the people that traveled all the way to India just for these satsangs, when the person they traveled so far to see lived most of their time in a country much closer. But, there are some mysteries of the world that will remain unsolved and its probably for the best not to delve into it.

The first satsang I attended was that of Mooji’s, which was probably the worst one to break my satsang virginity with. He was like a rockstar of the enlightened world (with westerners, not the locals but that is another story) and lining up hours before the satsang was essential to get a seat. Things I will wait hours in line for are few and far between, but I thought if I was going to do this satsang I was going to do it right. I arrived 2hrs before the scheduled time only to find myself about 2hrs late, standing in line behind hundreds of people a few blocks from the actual gate. The line provided enough entertainment to pass the hours though, local vendors knowing a good money making opportunity when they saw it, set up fruit stalls along the queue, and I was able to enjoy some fresh coconut juice as I partook in one of my favorite activities of people watching/listening and interrupting in random strangers conversations. Within 25 m of my place in line, there seemed to be someone from every continent in the world. Though I had no idea what it was exactly that Mooji did, numerous people were there as without even directly meeting him, they claimed he had significantly impacted their lives. His fame was so widespread that the satsang that day would be attended by approximately 1000 people, translated into 4 languages, and streamed live on the internet.

Finally it was time to enter the building and find our seats for the satsang. We had to maintain silence as we entered, shoes were removed and we were ushered to our seats by people in white flowing robes (as I write this I can’t help but realize that this was probably the closest I have ever been in my life to a cult setting, but somehow this never dawned on me at the time). Thanks to my late arrival into the lineup, I found myself in the back half of the room, craning my neck to see around a pole so I could get my first glimpse of the person everyone had flocked from afar to see. I had been prepared slightly for what was about to ensue. The satsang would be done in the format of a question and answer session, and it would be luck of the draw who Mooji would call on to ask a question. No one had been pre-selected based on their question, which I heard from others who had attended his satsang in the days preceding my visit, could result in some pretty interesting situations. As Mooji had this rockstar following, he also had the fans that took things to the extreme, including people having what could only be described as an orgasm just from Mooji acknowledging them, to others begging him just to let them kiss his feet, claiming the one thing they wanted more than anything in the world was to just touch him. Sometimes though, someone with a legitimate question would be picked, and an informative session would ensue. From daily issues of jobs and relationships to furthering one’s spiritual practice, Mooji had a unique skill of explaining the unexplainable in a way that resonated with the general masses. For some, he could explain something so simple in a way that could shift someones perception of an issue previously seeming solution-less.

Some of those that flocked to this satsang made the uber-spirituals I had met in peru (“The Characters You’ll Meet“) seem like boring 9-5 businessmen in comparison. In the amazon, its possible that the combination of the remote jungle settinng, ayahuasca, and puking tended to humble the most egotistical person. In India these things did not exist (except for the occasional bout of food poisoning) and the absolute worst type of uber-spiritual people existed here, the ones who were so egotistical they actually believed they had no ego. While the facilitators told anyone asking questions to keep it general so the response would be applicable to more of the audience, the questions asked often involved the person giving a detailed account of their spiritual journey, sometimes not even getting to a question but more seemingly seeking Mooji’s approval of their lives. I remember one woman’s interaction with Mooji very clearly, she was visibly an uber-spiritual type, though her desperation to talk with him showed attachment (the nemesis of the uber-spiritual, who almost are attached to detachment). She expalined to Mooji how she had done so much spiritual work, transcending states of consciousness, releasing all physical attachments, that she had overcome her ego, blah blah blah, but now she didn’t know what was the next step. Up to this point I had been listening to Mooji’s responses and knew that he was legitimate, but his response to this woman showed that he was absolutely brilliant. “My dear, if you had truly overcome your ego you would not feel the need to tell me about it.” I couldn’t hold back my laughter, he had a magical way of calling out people on their bullshit without crushing their spirit. I respected that, but not quite enough to warrant standing in that line again to attend another one of his satsangs while I was in India. One time was enough for me.